SAW-2003 short film

In 2003, two Aussies got together to write and direct a short horror film that they would use to pitch a full length film based on the subject of their short film.

The short film was called Saw and it was directed by James Wan and written by Wan and Leigh Whannell. The music was composed by Charlie Clouser, a touring member of Nine Inch Nails.

The short opens in an interrogation room, a man in handcuffs named David is telling a detective what "happened" to him.

David works at a hospital as an orderly and was abducted during his last shift.

He wakes up strapped to a chair in an abandoned building, the now iconic reverse bear trap on his head.

 

Saw's now mascot, Billy the Puppet, appears on a tv, demonstrating what will happen to David once the timer on his trap reaches zero.

The key to David's trap is in the stomach of a near by dead man.

Surprise surprise, the dead man isn't really dead, just paralyzed.

David gets the trap off right before the timer goes off.

Billy wheels in on his tricycle  and congratulates David on winning.

The short ends with David sobbing in the interrogation room while the detective asks him if he is grateful to be alive.

From an eight minute film with a $3000US budget to a franchise that spawned seven films, with an eight film in development with a release date slated for October 27,2017. 

Saw is the second highest grossing horror franchise, behind Friday the 13th.

Masters of Horror- "Jenifer" (2005)

Masters of Horror was an anthology tv series created by director Mick Garris for the Showtime Network. Garris is best known for adapting Stephen King stories, like Sleepwalkers and The Stand.

Directors known for their contributions to the horror genre, the "Masters", would each direct a 60 minute stand-alone story. One of my favorite episodes was episode four of season one, Jenifer.

It was director by Dario Argento, the Italian giallo master, who's greatest film is arguably 1977's Suspiria. The episode is an adaption of a comic book story by the same name. Written by Bruce Jones and illustrated by Bernie Wrightson, it appeared in Creepy Comics #63 (July 1974)

Episode opens detective Frank Spivey and his partner eating lunch in their patrol car under a bridge. Frank decides to talk a walk and witnesses a man dragging a woman down to the water side.

This unknown man was ready to hack her to pieces if Frank didn't interfere and shoot the man.

"Jenifer" His last words.

Frank Spivey's partner eventually shows, exchanging words about what the hell happened and Frank jumps back at the sight of Jenifer's big, black, pupil-less eyes.

At the police station, Spivey goes over the ordeal with his superior and argues about having to attend psych meetings, but it's required since he killed someone. The scene ends with him sharing a distant moment with Jenifer.

We find out that Frank is married and he'd rather drink in front of his wife, Ruby, than taking his partner's earlier offer to go to a bar. He's brooding throughout dinner and snaps at his wife at one point, this moment is interrupted by their teen-aged soon coming home.

His wife seduces him, but his mind is still stuck on Jenifer. Frank tries to anally rape his wife while flashes of a tied-up Jenifer and the man he killed intercut. Ruby forces Frank off of her and calls him a bastard.

A meeting with psych reveals that the man Frank killed use to be a businessman, then he lost it all and was disowned by his family. Frank inquires about Jenifer, who's been sent to an asylum; so he takes her home.

Jenifer can't speak, only making dog like whimpers, until she comes across the family cat and hisses back.

Frank dreams of a normal faced Jenifer is awoken by the real Jenifer's whines. Frank's wife and son meet Jenifer shortly thereafter, each exchanging screams with her. Ruby wants her out and Jenifer answers with a kiss.

The next day, Frank tries to leave her on the side of the road, but she convinces him otherwise by his licking is hand. Frank gives in to her and they have sex in the car.

They go back to Frank's house and Ruby gives him an ultimatum: Jenifer goes or she goes. Ruby doesn't need an answer cause they catch Jenifer eating the cat, even offering some to Frank.

The next day, Jenifer meets the little girl next, the girl is throwing flowers into a kiddie pool and I imagine this scene is an homage to Frankenstein.

Meanwhile, Frank spirals into alcoholism as evident by the background blues music and the use of Dutch angles. He happens upon a flyer for the circus and stumbles home.

Frank hears a rumbling when he gets in and we see that the little girl suffered a faith worse than drowning.

Frank pays a visit to that circus the next day, paying off a worker to abduct Jenifer. This plan goes as you would expect; the circus man ends up in Frank's fridge.

In a panicked rage, Frank flees the city with Jenifer to a shack in the woods, and of course, they have sex again.

Frank gets a job at a general store that's ran by a single mother. Jenifer spies on Frank one day, not liking the woman talking to Frank.

Jenifer takes "revenge" by leading the woman's son on a chase through the woods after he spotted the back of her at a party.

Frank finds them at the shack, Jenifer eating the boy penis first.

The episode ends like it begins.

Frank drags Jenifer out to the woods, axe in hand. A hunter comes upon them and shoots Frank right after telling him to drop the axe. The hunter frees Jenifer and the cycle begins again.

WWF's Shotgun Saturday Night Episode 2 (1-11-1997)

Nothing says "new generation" of the WWF like the Honky Tonk Man opening up a show that's suppose to be geared towards the ECW audience.

The All-Star Cafe in New York City is hosting the second episode of Shotgun. I'm hoping by episode four that the show is filmed in a bingo hall or roadhouse bar.

Sable and her afterthought of a husband, Marc Mero, arrive by limo.

Tonight's card is:

1. "Wildman" Marc Mero vs. Diesel

2.Savio Vega vs. Faarooq

3.Rocky Maivia

Vocal chord shredding Vince McMahon quickly mentions that Diesel is already in the micro-ring, the camera cuts to Vince and the hip shaking Sunny.

Sunny's "sex tape" will be shown at some point on the show, her way of one uping Marlena from last week.

Todd Pettengill narrators a clip of The Sisters of Love getting arrested outside the Disney store in NYC.

Marc Mero has a Spinal Tap moment, getting lost on the way to the ring. Vince and Sunny stall by bringing up Sunny's sex tape. She claims that she's the only way with the guts to show something like that nation wide.

Sunny also says that Sable and Mero took a limo here because Sable would get too many $10 offers walking the streets.

19 years later and one is married to millionaire Brock Lesnar and the other is doing skype sessions for $50.

Diesel Pearl Harbors Mero and creeps after Sable, causing her to pull a Three Stooges and smash a piece of cake in his face, which gets a slight E-C-W chant from the crowd.

The Wildman starts to run mild on the second coming of Diesel with corner punches, punches, and maybe a kick or two.

The punch-kick affair continues and Sunny teases a possible relationship with Rocky Maivia, something that was hinted at in episode one.

The chunky Razor Ramon, played by Rick Titan, kicks Mero when he's down, but fear not Wildman fans, Rocky is there to the rescue, taking a slip throwing punches and brawling to the back.

Diesel still in control after the commercial break, utilizing all of Kevin Nash's move.

Diesel hits the diving top rope clothesline, a signature move in his later career as Kane.

Mero finally gets some more offense in, a headscissors- frankensteiner variant, only because they didn't have enough ring room. The Honky Tonk finds his way ringside and starts harassing Sable, all while Mero caps off his comeback with a beautiful moonsault.

He doesn't go for the pin, instead chasing Honky away from his wife. Continuing the trend that if you come to your significant other's aid during a wrestling match, you'll lose, and this match FINALLY end with Diesel picking up the win with a jackknife powerbomb.

The post-match is a mess: Sable tries to console Mero, who leaves the ring, giving Honky the opportunity to harass Sable some more, only for him to be run off by Rocky Maivia, which upsets Sunny as she's been calling him recently, and finally, Mero returns to the ring and trades punches with Maivia.

 

Savio Vega vs. Faarooq was a nothing match, just filler till Sunny's sex tape.

Sunny romps around in bed with a man in a giant Elmo costume. This thong-clad version is "Fondle Me" Elmo, older brother of "Tickle Me". The lights go off and Sunny tells him to get ready for space mountain.

From one disappointing segment to the next. The Honky Tonk Man and Todd Pettengill sing a duet. 

The main event is more or less the same as the other two matches. Couple of notes:

We want Hall chants at the fake Ramon.

Honky Tonk pops up again ringside.

Sunny voices concern for Maivia throughout the match.

Honky gets a few kicks in on Maivia after Razor dumped him outside, but Rocky wins after reversing a Razor's Edge and hitting an awkward shoulder breaker.

Nikolai Volkoff makes a cameo, living in the card board boxes that Todd Pettengill is checking out.

and the Headbangers vs. Doug Furnas and Phil Lafond was the dark match main event, going past the time slot.

MTV Presents WCW SnowBrawl 2-6-1999

The Nitro Girls open up this MTV special dancing to the Offspring's Pretty Fly.

Commentary team for the event are Jimmy Hart, Larry Zbyszko, and Rob Zombie. Hart puts Zombie over as the living legend of heavy metal and Zombie isn't that bad on commentary, but you can tell he's reading lines written for him.

Hart holds up the trophy for winning today's contest, a 7 man battle royal. Zbyszko quips that he hasn't worked with the walking dead since Dusty Rhodes.

Howard Stern Show personality John Melendez is the ring announcer and the contestants are as follows:

1. Konnan- He wants to kick Marilyn Manson's ass.

2.Kenny Kaos- Has Sandra Bullock's phone number, but refuses to use it.

3.Disco Inferno- His favorite bands are the BeeGees  and the Village People.

4.Billy Kidman- The last book he read was Howard Stern's.

5.Brian Adams- He wants to get his hands on those little Hanson kids. Adams has had a lot of gimmicks throughout his career, I don't remember pedophile being one of them.

He tries to bully Melendez, who's having none of it, standing there with a sarcastic smug look on his face, just wanting to get paid.

6.Wrath- Van Halen lover.

7. Booker T-He idolizes Muhammad Ali.

Instead of their standard entrance music, every wrestler had hard rock or rap music  to accompany them to the ring.

Nitro Girls number for the commercial break  and ring the bell!

Kidman avoids elimination early on and there's no real spots throughout the match.

Wrath tried to add some excitement by hitting his finisher on Disco, but he gets gang tossed out instead.

At one point, Disco gets stomped repeatedly in the corner and Rob Zombie has a line about Disco sure to have brain damage the next day.

Kaos gets eliminated via back-body drop from Konnan.

Brian Adams foolishly tries to powerbomb Kidman.

Brian Adams and Disco Inferno, each wearing a different NWO shirt, toss Konnan out. Kidman gets eliminated by a spinning axe kick from Booker T.

The NWO double team is too for Booker and then Adams press throws Disco out of the ring, winning the match and giant snowflake statue.

Adams' acceptance speech is cut short by Konnan, who hits an X-Factor and dropkicks Adams out of the ring.

Konnan closes the special by giving the NWO a very heartfelt message, that the next time they see him, they can toss his salad and peel his potato for him. 

Wonder Woman- 2011 TV Pilot

DC comics has been a roll recently with television shows based on their properties.

Their Arrowverse on The CW comprises of The Flash, Green Arrow, Legends of Tomorrow, and now Supergirl, who they picked up from CBS. There is also talks of Matt Ryan continuing to portray John Constantine, a character that lasted one season on NBC, but has been accepted as a part of the Arrowverse continuity.

DC also has Lucifer and Gotham on FOX, iZombie on The CW, and Preacher on AMC.

Success wasn't always the case; sometimes you have strike out before hitting one out of the park.

NBC's Wonder Woman pilot back in 2011 was such that strike out. 

The pilot cold-opens with a young black man named Willis opening his college acceptance letter and celebrating the good news with his family. This moment of joy is short-lived as he gets a sudden case of stigmata.

Cut to a super fast foot chase between a bald guy in a hoodie and Wonder Woman. After catching the mystery man, she draws a vial of his blood and turns him over to the police.

The title card flashes and various news reports of Wonder Woman's latest apprehension are being flipped through by Cary Elwes, he plays Henry Detmer, the man who runs WW's company for her.

On one channel is a male political pundit voicing his opinion against her, while Nancy Grace thanks God that she exist.

Just like Bruce Wayne, Wonder Woman uses her company, Themyscira Inc., to fund her superhero escapades. Dr. Phil also gets a cameo, deeming Wonder Woman as a showboat who's a little nuts and needs anger management.

Wanting some normalcy in her life, she slums in an apartment as Diana Prince, complete with glasses and a cat, Sylvester. She talks to him about finally making a Facebook profile, and swoons over Ryan Gosling in The Notebook.

Blink and you'll miss the flashback to her breaking up with her boyfriend Steve.

She has a meeting with Willis's mom the next day, she finds out that fast bald guy gave Willis some drugs that caused the first scene. These drugs were manufactured by Veronica Cale, evil businesswomen and superhero drug maker, who baldie is a pawn of.

After this meeting, she holds a press conference, outing Cale for making super steroids; Cale is played by the very British and very pretty Elizabeth Hurley. Wonder Woman ends the conference by threatening to "get" Cale if the law doesn't.

A board meeting on Wonder Woman's image reveals to me that she's damn near Ozymandias from Watchmen.

They're both wealthy with multi million dollar companies, both sell their superhero identities with toys and other merchandise, and both are ok with killing.

She takes a stand on the new dolls because of their bust size and it leads to her storming off.

Another flashback to Steve, the boyfriend she broke up with. She dumped him so that he wouldn't become a target once she started her crime-fighting career. While back in the present, Veronica Cale shows up to offer peace, and by peace, she means back off!

She says that she has Congress by the balls and that their balls come easily to her. There's a joke in there somewhere, but it's a little too easy, just like Congressional balls coming to Liz Hurley.

Quick trip to the hospital to talk to Willis and to interrogate the bald baddie. Instead of using the lasso of truth that she puts on his chest, she threatens to break his arm if he doesn't give up some information.

Note: Because this show is boring and I have not much to write about, Wonder Woman's police liaison is played by Pedro Pascal, who would go on to be Prince Oberyn in Game of Thrones and the lead on Netflix's Narcos.

Willis passes away later in the night, causing WW to spring into action and committing a cardinal sin by putting on her costume instead of spinning and it magically appears.

 After fighting Cale's gym-bro security team, she kills a guy! and confronts Cale.

  
The cops show up, Cale gets arrested, and the Justice Department's lawyer shows up, being none other than ex-boyfriend Steve.

Steve shacked up after being dumped by Diana, so she ends her night with Sylvester and sets up a Facebook profile.


This wasn't Adrianne Palicki's first go round with a failed comic book adaptation, she was the main villain in 2006's Aquaman pilot. 

Palicki would finally have success at comic book roles in 2014

as Bobbi Morse on Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.